The sorrow of love

By Fr. Roy Cimagala

THAT’S when whatever causes us pain, suffering and sorrow is referred and united to the saving passion, death and resurrection of Christ. That sorrow, though always with some bitterness, would also assume the flavor of sweetness, something that is not only bearable but also lovable. It’s a sorrow that is lived in love, enabling us to be willing to suffer out of love.

We therefore have to learn how to handle our sorrows well, since in the first place they are unavoidable in our life. We have to develop first of all the proper attitude and the corresponding skills so that our sorrows would not just be purely negative elements in our life. They, in fact, can and should become sources and occasions of many good things.

For this to happen, the first thing to do is to develop a spiritual attitude and supernatural outlook in life, based on our faith in God that has to grow stronger everyday. That faith, of course, would give rise to hope and charity that would put meaning and sweetness to whatever pain, suffering and sorrow we can experience in this life.

Taking care of the spiritual and supernatural aspects of our life enables us to imitate Christ in being patient and willing to go through all the sacrifices we can meet in our earthly life. It’s a patience that is also founded on the truth that all our sorrows and sufferings in life always have some redemptive meaning.

Our main problem in this issue of our earthly suffering and sorrow is that our attitude towards this unavoidable element in our life is taken out of its fundamental context of faith and religion. We just look at it in a purely human and natural way. We just look for the human and natural causes as well as for their human and natural solutions or remedies.

If we follow the wisdom of our Christian faith, we for sure would lose the fear of suffering and sorrow. In fact, the contrary would take place—we would look for occasions when we can suffer and experience sorrow.

If we believe in Christ and follow what he has taught and shown us, we will realize that there is nothing to be afraid of suffering and death, and all the other negative things that can mark our life.

He bore them himself and converted them into our way for our own salvation. Yes, even death which is the ultimate evil that can befall on us, an evil that is humanly insoluble. With Christ’s death, the curse of death has been removed. “Death has been swallowed up in victory. Where, O death, is your victory? Where, O death, is your sting?” St. Paul said. (1 Cor 15,54-55)

So, we just have to be sport and cool about the whole reality of suffering and death. What we need to do is to follow Christ in his attitude toward them. For Christ, embracing suffering and ultimately death, is the expression of his greatest love for us. We have to enter into the dynamic of this divine logic and wisdom so we can lose that fear of suffering and death and instead, convert them into expressions of love.

Thus, we have to understand this very well. Unless we love the cross, we can never say that we are loving enough. Of course, we have to qualify that assertion. It’s when we love the cross the way God wills it—the way Christ loves it—that we can really say that we are loving as we should, or loving with the fullness of love. This is when we can experience the sorrow of love.

Email: roycimagala@gmail.com