The root of Judas’ betrayal

We might think that Judas, who is notoriously known as the apostle who betrayed Jesus, betrayed his master solely out of greed for money. But there was an incident before the treacherous kiss in the Garden of Gethsemane that would give us a hint that Judas’ heart was already separated from Jesus, aside from his attachment to money. “Separated” might be a softer word; a better word could be “opposed” or “going against,” as we would see in Judas’ attitude in this incident.

It happened when Mary poured an expensive perfume on Jesus’ feet in the Gospel of St. John. “Six days before the Passover, Jesus came to Bethany, where Lazarus lived, whom Jesus had raised from the dead. Here a dinner was given in Jesus’ honor. Martha served, while Lazarus was among those reclining at the table with him. Then Mary took about a pint of pure nard, an expensive perfume; she poured it on Jesus’ feet and wiped his feet with her hair. And the house was filled with the fragrance of the perfume. But one of his disciples, Judas Iscariot, who was later to betray him, objected, ‘Why wasn’t this perfume sold and the money given to the poor? It was worth a year’s wages.’ He did not say this because he cared about the poor but because he was a thief; as keeper of the money bag, he used to help himself to what was put into it.
‘Leave her alone,’ Jesus replied. ‘It was intended that she should save this perfume for the day of my burial. You will always have the poor among you, but you will not always have me.’” (John 12:1-8)

What was Mary doing that Judas found outrageous? Dr. Peter Kreeft says the answer in one word is “adoration.” Turning away from adoration is equivalent to turning away from heaven because adoration or worship is what we are to do mostly when we get to heaven: adore God for eternity. Judas essentially did not want to adore God, and if you don’t adore God, guess who is adored? Oneself.

Adoration is love unlimited, love multiplied many times, love raised to infinity by the exponent of love itself. Adoration is the mountain without a summit. Only God may be adored, because only God is unlimited goodness, truth, and beauty, and thus only God deserves unlimited love. Our very “first and greatest commandment” is to love Him with all our heart, soul, mind, and strength (Mark 12:30). If we give that love to any creature, even to our spouse, we commit adultery against God. That is what idolatry is: spiritual adultery. But spiritual adultery is mainly due to adoring oneself instead of God.

We are commanded to love our neighbor only “as ourselves” — and we are surely not commanded to adore ourselves. And that is why we should also not adore our neighbor. We must not treat anyone, whether ourselves or our neighbors, as God, by loving them with our whole heart. And we are certainly not to give our whole heart to things. Even more stupid is to give our whole heart to money, which is only a thing to exchange for things. And that’s what Judas did. Judas committed spiritual suicide even before he committed physical suicide. He killed Jesus twice: spiritually (in his soul) and physically (by handing Jesus over to the Jews).

That’s why the number one sin of mankind is pride, which is essentially selfishness. And to be holy means to get rid of selfishness. We need to be like Christ, who practiced self-forgetful love by not focusing on himself most of the time, but more on others. It does not mean total self-forgetfulness or no more love for oneself, but simply not focusing too much on ourselves. It’s replacing that habit of focusing on oneself with the focus that we give to God and others. It’s when we lose ourselves that we are most happy.