Patience and charity in fraternity

By Fr. Roy Cimagala

WE cannot deny that in our family and community life, we have to contend with the unavoidable differences and even conflicts that we can have with others. For this, we have to be ready to be always patient and charitable if only to keep our family life and fraternity alive and healthy.

Even in the life of Christ and of the apostles, there were differences and setbacks to contend with. There were misunderstandings, difficulties, failures, suffering for others. Obviously, the model to follow on how to handle this condition of ours is Christ himself, who went so far as to give his life for love. Let’s remember what he said in this regard: “Without me, you can do nothing.” (Jn 15,5).

Once we commit ourselves to closely follow Christ, we will realize that patience and strength to withstand whatever difficulties we encounter in our dealings with others can only come from love as lived and as commanded on us by Christ.

With this patience that is fueled by Christian charity, we can manage to overcome fear, pain and whatever dangers can come our way. We can manage to resist evil and to persist in doing good. We can somehow overcome our own limitations, and can manage to be accepting of others no matter how different and in conflict they are with us.

With this patience that is fueled by Christian charity, we can validate what St. Paul once said: “I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.” (2 Cor 12,9-10)

We should not forget that Christ deals with us according to our needs, and that is how we should also try to deal with each other. Our affection for one another should not be lost in the anonymity of whatever crowd we may be in. Like Christ, we should pay attention in a very personal and intimate way to each person we meet.

This can mean that we have to learn to love everybody without exception, even with their defects. We have to learn to love everyone as they are and not as we would want them to be. Otherwise, we will inevitably strain our fraternity with our egoism. And instead of being a support to them, we would make ourselves as their judges.

If we are truly driven by Christian love that would enable us to be tough in our patience, we would manage to avoid feeling offended when others commit some mistakes or cause us some pain. On the contrary, we would be quick to ask for pardon when we ourselves commit some mistakes, and to offer it when others commit them.

If we are truly driven by Christian love that would enable us to be tough in our patience, we would show our affection for others with deeds and not only with good intentions. We would take the initiative to know others more and more, especially in their needs, both material and spiritual.

Of course, if we really have concern for the others, we would be most interested in helping them in their spiritual life. They will always be in our thoughts and prayers. And for them we would be willing to make sacrifices.

Email: roycimagala@gmail.com