Lessons from the sisters Martha and Mary

By Fr. Roy Cimagala

WHAT these two sisters can tell us is that we will always have differences, and even conflicts, among ourselves, even if we belong to the same family or clan, the same neighborhood or group, etc. Martha was the active type, while Mary was the quiet and withdrawn type. (cfr. Jn 11,19-27; Lk 10,38-42) We should not be surprised by this fact of life. But we should be prepared to deal with it properly.

We have to realize that these unavoidable differences and conflicts are very good occasions for us to develop and grow in the virtues, especially of humility, patience and most importantly, charity. That’s how we should see these differences and conflicts. And so, more than being bothered by them, which is also unavoidable, we should rather be welcoming to them. In God’s providence, they come with some hidden and special gifts.

For this, of course, we should be guided by our Christian faith and follow the example of Christ who was willing to suffer the cruelest injustice inflicted on any man if only to consummate our human redemption. We just have to try our best to go to that extent, although we know that we can only go so far.

But we can always do something about this, no matter how small and insignificant it may be. As long as we persist in following the example of Christ, no matter how erratic and inconsistent at times, Christ himself has assured us that victory always awaits us at the end. It will be him who will get it for us, but also with us.

These days, many friends of mine complain about the “habal-habal drivers” or what they call as “kamote drivers.” I myself have my own negative reactions against them, especially when they would just suddenly appear in front me while driving my car. But I try my best to get over the irritation as quickly as possible.

What I would suggest is that, of course, we should be careful while driving on the road. Let’s do what they call as “defensive driving” which focuses on anticipating and responding to potential hazards, going beyond simply following traffic rules. It makes us always vigilant and quick to react properly to the actions of the other drivers.

But more than that, we can use those occasions when we get irritated or even angered on the road to practice and develop the virtues of patience, humility and, yes, even charity. Let’s pray for those who bother us on the road. Think and wish them well. This way, we are truly following the example of Christ in a direct way.

In time, we will notice that we are learning how to go above the unavoidable “drama” on the road. We can remain at peace and more focused on what truly matters in our life. We polish and refine the animal part of our humanity.

Let’s remember that as St. Paul said, we have to “bear each other’s burdens.” (Gal 6,2) Do we have that kind of outlook? Are we quick to help others even to the point of inconveniencing ourselves?

We have to start dismantling attitudes, habits and practices that keep us imprisoned in our own world, mistakenly thinking that these actually would make us happy or are good for us. We have to expand our heart to be able to resolve in a Christian way our unavoidable differences and conflicts.

Email: roycimagala@gmail.com