Just be cool when misunderstood and persecuted

By Fr. Roy Cimagala

THAT’S simply because things would just get worse if we behave otherwise. In our life, we should expect these things to happen to us. It’s part of our wounded human nature. It should not surprise us. But obviously, we should learn how to be properly prepared for it.

We cannot deny that the world today is in a very toxic condition that easily lends itself to misunderstandings among ourselves. The rapid developments, considered as progress, is actually creating a Tower-of-Babel effect where people, communities and societies are increasingly fragmented instead of being more united, giving rise to all forms of animosities and discord.

People are hardening in their biases, preferences and peculiarities, in their perceptions, views and opinions, and even in their core beliefs, without the corresponding effort to understand those with different positions.

Before all these, we need to be calm and figure out what the most prudent way to react is. Very often, we need to pause and pray, bring matters in the presence of God, asking for his light and guidance. We have to learn how to hold our horses. What we cannot understand and handle, let’s leave them in the hands of God who knows what to do with everything.

We just have to look at Christ and follow his way of handling misunderstandings. He was patient with everyone. Just imagine him having to contend even with his closest friends—the apostles—who in spite of their closeness to him did not understand him fully most of the time.

He just went about preaching, not minding so much how the people responded. There were those who immediately believed him, but there were also others who were always suspicious of him.

We should not mind so much how others would react and correspond to our views and positions. We should just focus first on thinking, saying and doing things as rightly as possible, in truth and in charity, as we are told by St. Paul. (cfr. Eph 4,15)

We have to learn to behave with extreme prudence, which should not be a cover for cowardice, since there will be times when we have to act with great courage even at the expense of extreme suffering. Part of this prudence is the virtue of tactfulness, of a certain restraint and moderation in our speech and actuations. We have to learn when to speak and when not, and how to deliver our points.

We should avoid getting involved in petty controversies. Rather, we should focus on issues and points that unite us rather than dwelling long on those that divide us. Let our assertions and clarifications be done in delicacy, which does not mean that we cannot be forceful.

For this, we need to be humble. A proud and conceited person, who always wants to have the last say, cannot avoid getting into wranglings. A humble person would be in a better position to see things more objectively and judge them more fairly. He is quick to correct himself when he is mistaken, and to forgive those who may misunderstand him.

We should be magnanimous to those who misunderstand us. “If anyone forces you to go one mile, go with them two miles,” Christ said. (Mt 5,41) We have to drown evil with an abundance of good.

We should be convinced that sooner or later some form of our vindication will take place as well as the proper resolution of the issues involved, if not here, then in the hereafter. Let’s just be patient, just as God is patient with all of us!

Email: roycimagala@gmail.com